THE POWER IN YOU

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Among so many violent experiences, Denisia highlights the lack of empathy and help within the police stations and discrimination suffered for being a black woman.

 

“ I arrived at the police station screaming, demanding protection, telling them about the aggression and people asking me what had I done? Asking that to the victim. I understood that I had to arrive tidy, well dressed, talking quietly and slowly, talking about my lawyer, in order to get better service. Because people who are black are already raised like this: always walk clean, tidy, so you won't be mistaken with a criminal, the reality is that black people are marginalized without reason.

When the white woman arrives at the police station, she always arrives with someone like a lawyer, the treatment is different, now the black woman who arrives, as in my case, disheveled, with a punch in the eye, a broken face, crying, the reaction is : sit down and wait.”

 

According to Denisia this is why women give up seeking help.

 

“My luck is that I work with therapy, I work with what I love and I believe in life, because that's why woman gives up. After so many police reports my case never reached the judge, I never had a hearing for the violence caused to me. This only happened after an aggression he did to my daughter.”

 

To Denisia, empowerment is not just passing on information, but also disseminating the work, talking about her, exposing who needs to be exposed and extolling those who deserve it.

 

“I am not a poor thing, I am not a victim. These were choices that I made, when I didn't know how to observe. It is not just making a basket and giving a donation, but teaching how to fish. I don't want the fish."

 

With a 100m restraining order, out of the house, Denisia had to find a way to survive.

 

“In the beginning I sold freshener sachets on the bus, recited poetry, sold hats on the beach. I turned around, I never wanted to be the poor thing, I don't want someone's money or things.”

 

For many years Denisia was disturbed by her daughter's father, even though she was in another relationship. A month after going to court - just because or the aggression he did with her daughter, because he had never went to court because the violence he committed on her - he reacted to an assault and died.

 

“Everything that happened in my life got me here. I found myself in therapeutic massage, I started eating natural food and studied about these things, and then I put self-care as a priority.”

 

Today, at the age of 44, with 4 children, Denisia works with Ayurveda massage, yoga and has training in Access Bars.

“I see myself as a very brave person, who accepts no less and I really am strong. I have my goals, I can supply myself, I can live my life alone, I can come, I know my body, I love myself so much. I can do anything."

 

One of the greatest goals of Denisia's life is to become a great example for her daughters, so that they become strong and determined women, like her mother.

 

“I am not afraid or ashamed to talk about this subject, it is not a trauma that I suffer or hurt when I go to this subject because I had to react at the exact moment. I only grew up after I left the guy's house and I heard him saying the opposite, that I would not survive alone."

 

For Denisia it is extremely important that women help each other, that there is sorority, where women who observe their friends in abusive relationships, suffering violence, have information, know how to welcome, until they open their door if necessary. It is necessary, first of all, to know what violence is and how to act in such a situation.

 

But above all, it is important not to give up, be resilient and continue to believe in your goals and your strength.

 

“I think it's great that I haven't lost the ability to love. Because, from what I went through, I could have become a bitter, traumatized woman who doesn't want to hear about men, but instead I continued to believe in love.”

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